Something has got to be wrong with me.

I always attract the wrong guys. There's this guy I hardly know, but he really likes me. It gives me an incredible urge to delete him from my life. Yes, delete. He told me that I need to be more talkative and that he knows I hate smokers. And that he sees me now and then walking down the hall, but he doesn't say anything because me eyes are giving a "screw-the-world" look... or something.

Just the fact that he admitted to all these things, I just want him gone. I had been trying to change my physical image so that I wouldn't attract these guys, but now I feel this even greater need to change myself. Only then will these jerks stop liking me. Or at least, that's what I have been (basically) forced to believe.

Usually I complain to myself now and then that guys don't like me. That I'm ugly. Then these guys come around, and I don't want them to like me. I may not be ugly to them, but I am to the guys I like. Or at least that's what I've forced myself to believe.

At these times I want the world to drop dead. I want to be alone, cry my eyes out as I listen to either heavy metal or incredibly sad music.

Megan's Playlist:
"Cancer" - My Chemical Romance
"Demolition Lovers" - My Chemical Romance
"Hello" - Evanescence
"Lithium" - Evanescence
"Buried Myself Alive" - The Used
"Le Disko" - Shiny Toy Guns (I've just been addicted to this song for... two weeks?)
"You're Not Alone" - Saosin
"I'm Not Okay (I Promise)" - My Chemical Romance
"Last Train Home" - lostprophets
"Crawling" - Linkin Park
"Populace in Two" - From First to Last
"Cassie" - Flyleaf
"Breathe Today" - Flyleaf
"Cloud Nine" - Evanescence
"Fields Of Innocence" - Evanescence
"Lies" - Evanescence
"My Immortal" - Evanescence
"Beast and the Harlot" - Avenged Sevenfold
"Unholy Confessions" - Avenged Sevenfold
"Imaginary" - Evanescence
"Taking Over Me" - Evanescence
"Sacred Lie" - Disturbed
"Spit" - Kittie
"Don't Stay" - Linkin Park
"Before I Forget" - Slipknot
"Duality" - Slipknot
"It's Far Better to Learn" - Saosin
"Missing" - Evanescence
"Bummer" - Scarling.
"Waiting" - Shiny Toy Guns


Yes, Evanescence rocks.

Grammy's this year was effed up, and there's still an hour left. I decided to go online to see the nominee list. I saw the producers and immediantly said "Come on Howard Benson, come on. Show me the money."
Howard Benson is one of my fav producers, he's done My Chemical Romance, Flyleaf, Saosin, and Three Days Grace. Andy Wallace is very awesome, too (Linkin Park, From First to Last, Chevelle, etc.), but he wasn't on the list. So maybe Howard doesn't sound that great, but I think he ROCKS out loud!

Category 91
Producer Of The Year, Non-Classical (A Producer's Award. (Artists names appear in parenthesis.))

Howard Benson:
Every Man For Himself (Hoobastank) (A)
Flyleaf (Flyleaf) (A)
In With The Out Crowd (Less Than Jake) (A)
One-X (Three Days Grace) (A)
The Paramour Sessions (Papa Roach) (A)
Popaganda (Head Automatica) (A)
Saosin (Saosin) (A)

T Bone Burnett:
Thunderbird (Cassandra Wilson) (A)
The True False Identity (T Bone Burnett) (A)
Walk The Line — Soundtrack (Joaquin Phoenix & Various Artists) (A)

Danger Mouse:
Pieces Of The People We Love (The Rapture) (T)
St. Elsewhere (Gnarls Barkley) (A)

Rick Rubin:
American V: A Hundred Highways (Johnny Cash) (A)
God's Gonna Cut You Down (Johnny Cash) (T)
Stadium Arcadium (Red Hot Chili Peppers) (A)
Taking The Long Way (Dixie Chicks) (A)
12 Songs (Neil Diamond) (A)

Will.i.am:
About You (Mary J. Blige Featuring Will.i.am) (T)
Big Girls Don't Cry (Fergie) (T)
Damn Girl (Justin Timberlake Featuring Will.i.am) (T)
I Am Somebody (Santana Featuring Will.i.am) (T)
I Love My B**** (Busta Rhymes Featuring Kelis & Will.i.am) (T)
Mas Que Nada (Sergio Mendes Featuring The Black Eyed Peas) (T)
Timeless (Sergio Mendes) (A)


And guess who won? Rick Rubin. I think it's cuz he did Neil Young and Johnny Cash. The judges must have a thing for old artists that can hardly even sing anymore (no offense to people who like them, I'm just saying...).


This makes me feel SOOO much better (the reason why MCR and Evanescence weren't nominated):
For recordings released during the Eligibility Year
October 1, 2005 through September 30, 2006


Category 13
Best Electronic/Dance Album (For vocal or instrumental albums. Albums only.)
Supernature (Goldfrapp) [Mute]
Confessions On A Dance Floor (Madonna) [Warner Bros.]
A Lively Mind (Oakenfold) [Maverick]
Fundamental (Pet Shop Boys) [Rhino Entertainment]
The Garden (Zero 7) [Atlantic]

Of that, Madonna won... *cough*


Category 21
Best Rock Album (Vocal or Instrumental. Includes Hard Rock and Metal.)

Try! (John Mayer Trio) [Aware/Columbia]
Highway Companion (Tom Petty) [American]
Broken Boy Soldiers (The Raconteurs) [V2/Third Man Records]
Stadium Arcadium (Red Hot Chili Peppers) [Warner Bros.]
Living With War (Neil Young) [Reprise]

*cough* Look at that! I mean REALLY! I read the list out loud and Matt was like "Neil Young?" Yes! Freaking Neil Young, because I have no idea why people like him so freaking much.
I am so happy that RHCP won. YAY!


Okay, best short form music video nominees were:
"8th of November" by Big and Rich
"When You Were Young" by The Killers
"Here It Goes Again" by Ok Go
"Dani California" by Red Hot Chili Peppers
"Writing On The Walls" by Underoath

I don't know about you, but I have NO idea how Underoath got on there. Yeah, it's pretty cool and the set is awesome, but I'm pretty sure "Crazy" was better... or something else I can't think of at the moment. But I'm SUPER happy that Ok Go won. YAY! Something great and semi-unexpected happened! Sweeeet.


I just feel like narrating or summarizing all the nominees/winners I didn't like or I thought was just weird. And I'm summarizing again. Okay, I'm shutting up... BLAH!